I Ain’t ‘Fraid of No Stereotype – I’m Pissed

So the official trailer for the remake of Ghostbusters has hit the internet.

And I am pissed-off.

I fully understand this is a reboot of the original Ghostbusters and the new characters somewhat mirror their male counterparts from 1984, but in the original, when Ernie Hudson’s character Winston joins the group he comes in -more or less- as an equal partner to the three scientists. So what happened to Leslie Jones’ character Patty in this remake? As depicted in this trailer, I don’t see it. It’s looks more like they, the three white scientists, are the brains and she is the loud mouth brawn.

It is 2016 and the trope of the smart white guys and their “street-wise” black partner is just plain OLD. Gender swapping does not make it less noticeable. The –you three got all your degrees, but I got a Cadillac, I know NYC and I will slap the ghost out of you! – scenes of Patty, as shown in the trailer, play so heavily on the Loud/Streetwise Black Woman stereotypes that it is a neck roll and three finger snap in a Z formation away from looking racist.

It is bad enough that women of color are under represented in movies as is. When we do appear it is often as some stereotype. And after so many years of movie going it is so frustrating to see again and again and yet again. Would it really have been so far out of the movie going mindset that Leslie Jones portray one of the scientists and let’s say Kate McKinnon portray the streetwise one?

Maybe Patty will come off more as an equal in the overall arc of the movie, I really hope so, because the trailer clearly missed the mark in portraying such.

At least this iteration of Ghostbusters will pass the Bechdel Test.

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Let’s see how other are slicing it up this Saturday…

sol

Slice of Life Story Challenge – Day 5 | Two Writing Teachers

Chick Please

I wear pantsuits for work, or at least dress slacks and a nice top. I dress womanly, feminine, but not necessarily girlie. That’s just not my everyday style. Generally, I’m a jeans and tee-shirt kind of gal.

But every now this thankfully only for a day-maybe two-phase comes over me where I want to wear a dress, curl my hair, put on make-up, yeah all the accoutrements involved.

It’s extra work and ninety percent of the time I think the only people who get it are those who know me well enough to appreciate the phenomena for what it is.  I refer to that as The Girl Won. Where the feminine aspect of me decidedly takes over my psyche and I’m going to dress like a girl today whether I like it or not. This morning was one of those mornings.

I had laid out my clothes for work last night. Jeans, because it will be casual Friday at work, (where even my boss will come in jeans and a sweatshirt now and then), my nice white and black blouse, my cropped black jacket… You know, lighter than professional casual but not I’m going to a picnic after work casual. I mean everything down to my lingerie was planned out for this morning. So why is it when I woke and looked at it hanging on the door my thought was uh no! ?

Aw crap The Girl woke up, noooo!

Sometimes I can fake her out, put on the clothes I initially chose anyway, just bling it out more than usual and she’s consoled enough to take it. I knew within fifteen minutes of clothing changes, there was no consoling her. Nothing I put on looked good to me until I pulled on the sweater dress.

Yup it was going to be a girl day. I could feel it – the whole kit and kaboodle was happening this morning. Hell the dress even has minute lines of pink in it! I conceded to defeat.

To add the true annoyance factor I stepped outside to snow.

Are you kidding me chick? You couldn’t have kicked in yesterday when the sun was out so bright, I needed sunglasses? No you show up today when there’s snow on the ground.

Yeah, that was my inner dialogue with my feminine side who pretty much shushed me with the reminder that it’s only snowing this morning. It will stop later and I will be looking great.

Ugh, Chick please, shut up!

I hate her, but she’s right, I do look great.  Happy Friday!

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Let’s see how others are slicing it up this Friday…

sol

Slice of Life Challenge – Day 4 | Two Writing Teachers

Take Me Home

You run your hand just slightly over my curve as though wanting desperately to touch,
but just not quite ready to commit to the act.

Yet, before I can exhale from the kinetic energy that runs between us from that
almost touch, you take me in hand totally,
and totally breathless, I sigh.

Soft and pliant to your administrations as your fingers alternately
grip me possessively for I am no one but yours;
you knead me solidly until I can do nothing but yield and then
you caress me in tender mercilessness.

Completely without care you lay me down before any who care to witness.
Completely wanton I am spread wide for you as you layer temptations upon me
in what feels like a never-ending circle of desire.

I am lifted, transported and though expecting it, am still totally unprepared
when subjected to the full force of your heat.

Your fire that surrounds, fills me, fulfills me; until it feels like
every square inch of my body is bubbling in throes of the ecstasy I am.

Still quivering, you pull me just from the verge and I want to cry
from this cruel game you play, easily slicing into me knowing
I am too far gone to protest  as you take me in to your hands yet again lifting me.

Even if I could, any such dissension is immediately silenced by the sudden feel
of your hot breath across my fevered surface as you lower your tongue
to the tip, slow torturous circles testing, tasting my flavors.

And just when I think I can take no more, I am plunged into the ecstasy of your mouth as
little by little I am devoured by your desired until I am naught by a memory.

<><>

You question my hunger for the freshly prepared pizza slice in front of me that sits untouched.
I wipe the crumbs of the slice that is now memory from your lips and assure you that my hunger
is for something else entirely.

Seeing the expression on my face,
you raise an eyebrow quizzically, knowingly…
and I answer…

“Yes, take me home”

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Going off the eaten path this evening…

dverse
dVerse Poets Pub | OpenLinkNight 167

One Monkey

I blinked at what I heard, for surely I was mistaken. That could not be what she just said to me.

I often find myself one of the few, if not the only, person of color of some of the events I attend. My tastes tend to cross over the presumed lines so often that it is to the point that I am relatively blind to finding myself in such situations anymore.

Every now and then, however, someone reminds me.

I made a slow, but definite pantomime of looking over my left shoulder, and then over my right one checking for the person I was very much aware did not exist behind me. I caught the eye of the friend who invited me. She saw my arched brow and bit her lip before quickly finding a spot on the table to give her undivided attention.  Not that I could blame her, I know she was mortified at what just happened and part grateful she was not going to be on the receiving end and what was about to happen. Thus, I was forced to turn my attention back to the woman awaiting my response. For the sake nicety I’ll refer to her as Ms. Thing.

“To whom are you speaking?” I asked with considerably more politeness than felt.

“Why you…” She responded as though that were obvious, which technically it was, but that wasn’t the point. “I want…”

“Oh, I know what you want.” I interrupted, leaning back in my seat, crossing my arms across my chest. The near textbook example of standoffish while seated. I would have crossed my legs at the knee to complete the look, but my thick thighs gave up that ghost a long time ago. “I take umbrage with the manner in which that want was expressed.”

“All I did was ask…”

“You did not ask anything.” I raised my hand stopping her.  “I was not asked if I could. I was not asked if I wanted to. I was not given the courtesy of being addressed by a name. You did not even bother to await my response, so assured were you that I would obediently leap to your call for a minstrel that you went right back to your conversation, only looking to face me again in the ensuing silence of my disobedience. At which point, you turned in your seat, clapped your hands a couple of times in my direction as though cajoling the presence of a favored pet. Then you pointed a lovely manicured talon at me and said, and I quote “You! I hear you’re a poet. Come recite something for us.”  as though I am some fez donning, vested simian, to come clanging cymbals upon your beckoning!”  I sat up in my seat, emulating her actions as I spoke.

Perhaps I should  take a moment to say that once I write a poem, I tend to forget it.   Unless I am writing for a specific prompt or challenge, I am expunging whatever emotion that warrants it through my words and I am done with it. Considering some of the things I do write about, it likely is a very good thing I do not keep such thoughts/emotions constantly with me. It would not be good. Still, I do have a couple of poems memorized for such occasions when I’m feeling gregarious, want to show off or at my own pleasure when asked nicely.

This situation did not fall into any of those categories.

I ended my little Julia Sugarbaker moment with “Granted, I am not Maya Angelou, I have not earned her level of veneration – yet, but I most certainly am not your personal jester to entertain the court on command to be granted no respect at all.”

“Oh come now, talk about over-exaggeration! Do you see this?” Ms. Thing turns to the other women at her table, looking for confirmation. “A person cannot say the most simple thing to you people these days without…” One of the women sitting at her table called her name sharply in clear reprimand, but Ms. Thing did not get it.

“What?”

No one spoke for a solid minute, apparently not knowing how to, let alone if they should, address the new elephant in the room. Interpreting the room full of silence as deafening consent of her behavior, I had heard and had enough. I glanced at my friend. who thankfully had read my mind, nodding once as she took her purse in hand.

I picked up mine, walked over to Miss Thing and stood in front of her where she had no choice but to look up at me.

“I am guessing the only time a person of color has stepped foot in here is as the entertainment or the help, so my presence here as invited guest likely had you confused. Now that you personally have engaged your first negro guest and have gotten over the shock, you’ll have a clue on how to treat the next one better. Regardless, if your friends and companions here, whether they agree with you or not, do not have the fortitude to say what is needed to you, then I will. Much like your ignorance – your privilege is showing. Please. Shut. Up.”

The woman who called out Ms. Thing’s name started to speak the expected apologies that etiquette, if not sincerity, required. It was much too little, much too late. I knew I wore the look and used the full force of it on her silencing  whatever further inanities were about to drop.

“My mother taught me never to be where I am not wanted, yet if we all heeded that advice we would not have Barack Hussein Obama as the President of the United States. However, my grandmother taught me to pick my battles. Going for the presidency is a worthy battle, being in the company of you is not. ”

With that I left.  Because really some days it’s just not worth it.

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Let’s see how others are slicing it up on this third day
sol

Slice of Life March Writing Challenge Day 3 – Two Writing Teachers

Giveth and Taketh

“I believe that inspiration will always try its best to work with you–but if you are not ready or available, it may indeed choose to leave you and to search for a different human collaborator…This is how it comes to pass that one morning you open up the newspaper and discover that somebody else has written your book [or blog post!]…or in any way whatsoever manifested some spark of inspiration that you’d had…but had never entirely cultivated…Therefore, the idea went hunting for a new partner.”

–Elizabeth Gilbert , Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

Oh, how much I do believe the truth of this. I posted absolutely nothing between late November and early February.  NOTHING.

It’s not that I did not have any ideas. I had plenty. But they all just came at odd times.

  • Hurrying down the stairs to catch a train.
  • Hands deep into slicing up meat to make a stew.
  • In the midst of teaching a class.
  • In a meeting with my boss.
  • and so on and so on…

Each time I said to myself things like “I’ll remember”, “I’ll work on it as soon as I finish_____”

Each time it was gone by the time I procured pen and paper. By God do you understand the frustration of knowing you had a great thought, an excellent lyric at the tip of your tongue, but now it’s gone can’t spit it out? I did this one time too many and the dearth of posts between November and February was my muse punishing me.

I have not seen my thoughts ideas elsewhere, at least not any can remember/recognize  lol, so at least I felt Muse has not totally given up on me, I just had to bide me time in the purgatory known as writers block. I am happy to say, Muse has decided to give me another chance and I’ve been a busy little these past couple of weeks.

I’m not messing with her again.

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Let’s see how others are slicing up their Day Two….

sol

Slice of Life Challenge Day 2| Two Writing Teachers

Ten Ticks…

I’ve realized time has been a been a thing with me as of late. No, not as of late, that’s disingenuous, I’ve always had a thing about time. Especially around now, around early spring for the past few years, but really from around this time last year until now, I’ve been a little more hypersensitive to its passing because this year, specifically this day, holds a special bittersweetness.

For in a few short hours, it will be ten years to the day, to the moment I became a widow.

Within days of it I remember looking at a clock and calendar through tear-stained eyes, wondering exactly how I would feel right now.  I also recall when a few very short years ago I had posted on how weird I felt the first time I forgot this day and did not mark its passing somehow.

Honestly, were it not for the decade marker today would likely have passed as another ordinary day in moment of my life. No more or less important than when a couple of weeks ago I realized another date and casually threw a  “Happy Birthday Bill!” into the heavens while getting in the car with my best friend to go shopping. The thought coming and going as quickly as a finger snap.

All of those years we spent together
Well they’re part of my life forever
I hold the joy with the pain
And the truth is I miss you my friend

If time is a healer
Then all hearts that break
Are put back together again
‘Cause love heals the wound it makes
— Time Is A Healer / Eva Cassidy

And as I sit here typing, taking a moment to acknowledge this as I prep for training, I am happy to say I feel fine. Understandably wistful, but fine.

Time is indeed a healer.

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Let’s see how others are slicing up their day….

sol

Slice of Life Challenge Day 1| Two Writing Teachers

 

The Nightbird

A man stands on the  rail gripping its notches
Notions crescendo in his heart once more
As Sol sets again in deep hued swatches

In the near distance the nightbird watches

He gazes at the still deepening skies
Heartbreak are words clutched tight in his hands
Gives a resolute shrug the heart belies

In the near distance the nightbird sighs

He looks down upon the street through his tears
Passers-by unaware he’s on the edge
The cacophony of sound comes to him as jeers

In the near distance the nightbird fears

From past dusk to near dawn as its stead
The nightbird sings its pleas with dread
The winds carries the calls from overhead

In the near distance the man knows not what was said

He balances on, his thoughts in muddled heaps
Reclamation from his sorrow long gone
A last glance to Sol rising then he simply leaps

And in the near distance the nightbird weeps

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In honor of Harper Lee, Kelly at dVerse invites us to tell a story in narrative poem. There is an added bonus for featuring a mockingbird, but my muse had other ideas.

dverse

dVerse Poets Pub | Poetics:  Listen to the Mockingbird

Just Die Already

“… Yo that nigger was mad tight… The nigga seriously wanted to hurt somebody…No, but the nigga didn’t say that…Yo, my nigga really?… Nigga don’t go there…”

This was the piece of a conversation I overheard between two train stops as I rode home from work last night. I’m guessing my distaste for what I, and a good portion of the subway car overheard because he was not even trying to moderate his voice, must have shone on my face as he turned his back to me and continued with a string of words further enhanced with the slur. All of that from one person, all within the span of a standard television commercial break.

And here we go again, the love/hate relationship of the use of the N-word.

I remember growing up saying any version of the word was as much an epithet as dropping the f-bomb in front of my mother as it was as a phrase of solidarity among her male peers. There was/is somehow this unspoken agreement “my nigger” just did not apply to women. Even when I hear females say it now, 90% of the time they refer to someone male, sorry guys.

When trying to explain why I feel the use of the word offensive, regardless of who utters it, I’m often made to feel like I’m overreacting when I’m around some of my peers. Or the offending person feels the need to defend him or herself, because the only thing worse than being ignorant is being called ignorant.

And the thing that is hardest to explain is that the relatively unfettered use of this word is coming from a position of privilege most of today’s young blacks don’t even realize they have. This social advantage is so ingrained in our culture that most either aren’t aware or simply don’t care their comments are coming off the backs of centuries worth of hardship and oppression. They did not live personally through when word was nothing other than a vile degradation.

As with all young children, I knew nothing of the world beyond the boundaries of my neighborhood. Thus in grade school learning of the assassination of Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King was simply another lesson learned in history with no more or less import on my life as the lessons about Abe Lincoln and Harriet Tubman to my child’s eyes. Being all of four years of age when he died, the import was lost on me. I was a teen before I realized that I was alive when King was assassinated, and just how close segregated times were a reality for myself.

By the time I became aware of the world I was able to sit in the back of the bus because I wanted to, not because I had to. Thus, I could not understand  why my mother refused to do so even when seats were available. It was ingrained in her reality as a person who came of age through segregation to refuse to sit in the back of the bus, but not mine as I child who had not grown up in such. It was a thisclose reality, but still not my reality.

Knowing the word nigger existed to hurt is one thing, living an existence in it’s hurt is another.  Sympathy is not empathy. I can only surmise the ones who use it freely now really do not understand its power to hurt because it was never really used to hurt them. In a world where it the slur nigger holds as much impact as the curse fuck – it’s not their reality.

Now let’s consider other racial slurs that have come, and for the most part gone, in the immediate tome stream such as spic and kike, and for that matter coon and jigaboo. Words that you rarely hear spoken aloud any more. Because those affected by such slurs asserted their respect for themselves and refused to allow anyone to disrespect them with its use. And made damned sure the world knew to accept that respect.

So what the hell happened with the word nigger that it still survives and thrives to continue in its controversial life?  Why can’t it die off as some of those other slurs?

Because of men like the young man on the cell phone who dropped the word several times without a thought in the less than three minutes it took to get from one train station stop to another, it keeps being used.

How can it die if we keep letting it live?

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An introspective slice from the Raivenne today, let’s see how others are slicing it up…

Slice of Life Challenge | Two Writing Teachers

sol

Making Room

I go into the kitchen to eat…

fork, knife, spoon,

glass, bowl, plate

All as it should be

and yet it’s all wrong as I turn off the pot,

 

I go to shower…

all the bathing gels, hair goop,

shaving products, fill the cabinet

All as it should be

and yet it’s all wrong as I turn off the water,

 

I choose my outfit for the next day

my overfull closet

of shirts, ties, pants

skirts, dresses,  scarves

All as it should be

And yet it’s all wrong as I turn off the TV,

 

I  wake up and find

Both sides of the bed

In disarray

As I raise a brow

and finally I realize…

 

Ten years…

 

When I eat, bathe,

Get dressed,

Even subconsciously in my sleep

I don’t make room for you any more

Except in memory.

All as it should be

And it’s all right as I turn on the lights

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Time flies…

Mary at dVerse prompts us to write about “room” however we choose to interpret it. My muse it translated  to the day I realized I no longer made physical space for my late-husband in my life.  Now as I acknowledge my tenth year of widowhood, he’s taking up a little more space than usual, but

“All as it should be

And it’s all right …”

dverse

dVerse Poets Pub | Poetics – Room With or Without a View

Winter is coming-er-leaving

For us working stiff in the U.S. part of the North America hemisphere we have two times during the year that tend to suck. One is the dog days of summer when there are no major federal holidays between Independence Day (July 4th), and Labor Day (the 1st Monday in September). The other time is right now where we celebrate the births of Presidents Lincoln and Washington who had the nerve to be born in the same month. Originally, the dates were two separate holidays in February (yay!), but some grumpitygrumpgrumps got in their heads that was just too much time off and combined them into one major holiday called President’s Day. It is my honest suspicion this was done to preempt those days far down the road of having to honor future great presidents with their own personal days, eventually filling the calendar. “We gave them all one special day to celebrate, you’re not getting any more, now get back to work you peons!” — but I digress, sorta…

President’s Day, which still only honors Abe and George for now, was yesterday. That now means there are no more Federal holidays until Memorial Day at the end of May.  That is  half of February, all of March, all of April and because of how the calendar falls this year, all but one day of May  before we have a government paid holiday off from work. Thus we have reached the other time during the year we 9-to-5ers abhor.  Or as I not-so-poetically stated on my Facebook page this morning…

rai

“And now we enter the dread of winter…”

The realization that this stretch of time in, is nearly twice as long the summer stretch is a special misery. That many of us are in the middle of a very cold winter does not help. Temperatures dropped to an unseasonably brutal teens yesterday. That’s wickedly cold even for this native New Yorker whose memory still holds the nice warm sunny days from vacationing in the Middle East just a two mere weeks ago.

So there’s absolutely nothing to break up the Monday thru Friday monotony, and the pouring rain and umbrella ripping winds that await me for my trek home tonight fill me with such cheer as well.

And  despite my moaning and groaning, as I have to acknowledge today’s crazy rain starts a set of days where the temps are above freezing for the first time in a couple of weeks and I’m already thinking about my St. Paddy’s day outfit.

Not to mention Game of Thrones and Outlander returning to TV.

So, the bad news? Spring is a long 32 days away *grumbles*.

But the good  news? Spring is a mere 32 days away *cheers*.

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Let’s see how other’s are slicing through their day…

sol