I went to sleep in a foul mood and it has followed me to my waking hours. No, not foul because it denotes anger, I’m not feeling angry. I’m feeling inexplicably… hurt. Okay, maybe not totally inexplicably now that I’ve identified the correct emotion, yet I’m feeling it nonetheless and the weather is not helping in the improvement of it.
I’m staring out of the window watching the first snow of Winter 2011/2012. The artist in me can’t help but admire the pretty, pristine fluffy whiteness as it gently vales. As for the rest of me? I am not happy. It’s still officially early autumn. Snow? In New York City? In October? Any snow after Veteran’s Day but before December gives me pause, but it’s in November so I can accept it, but this? There is something innately wrong with this super early snow fall. Granted, I already know it’s not going to be much of a snow fall and it will melt quickly. Still… It’s snowing and it’s actually sticking to the ground, in October. If this is a sign of what’s to come, I am NOT looking forward to this winter at all.
Looks like it’s going to be a long, quiet weekend inside the house and my thoughts after all.
“And I can’t keep holding on
To what you’ve got
When all you’ve got is hurt.”
U2 – One
Raivenne-lations 
I wake up in these types of moods sometimes. Usually, it isn’t centered on the weather, but it is almost always a surprise attack. Nothing is really wrong, but I feel a hurting depression pressing down on me. My counter to it is to basically deny it and move into my day in spite of it; it’s almost a kiss-my-butt-I-ain’t-gonna-let-this-ruin-my-day kind of attitude. It doesn’t make the feeling instantly vanish, but most times I am able to overcome it. I’m the boss of me!
Try it, Raivenne!
I saw the snow and said “Ugh!”, or was it “Oh, fuck!”, and then continued on.